Domestic Violence at Home: What Resources are Available?

Danielle Husseini, Esq.

Domestic Violence Awareness Month: Danielle Husseini provides information on fleeing violence and Orders of Protections.

In 2023, Tennessee saw over sixty thousand (60,000) reported domestic violence cases. An estimated twenty to twenty five percent (20% – 25%) of divorces are a result of domestic violence in the United States. Experiencing domestic violence at home? What are your options to protect you and your children? This article explains what domestic violence is and provides options to remove yourself from these volatile and dangerous situations.

While Tennessee reported over sixty thousand (60,000) domestic violence cases in 2023, the reality is that a significant number of domestic violence cases go unreported. If you and/or your children are experiencing domestic abuse at home, you are not alone. Domestic violence occurs in situations where an intimate partner, family member, household member, or other person with whom you share a qualifying relationship domestically abuses, sexually assaults, or stalks you. The Shelby County Crime Victims and Rape Crisis Center defines domestic abuse as when a qualifying person:

  1. Physically hurts you, tries to physically hurt you, or puts you in fear of physical harm;
  2. Threatens you with serious physical harm;
  3. Physically restrains you (i.e., confines your movements or imprisons you in any way, such as locking you in a room);
  4. Destroys or damages your property on purpose (maliciously); and/or
  5. Injures, attempts to injure, or puts you or your minor children in fear that he or she will injure any animal owned, possessed, leased, kept, or held by you or your minor children.

Getting out of an abusive situation is the number one priority in any domestic violence situation. Unfortunately, this step can also be extremely difficult due to financial, physical, and other burdens keeping you (and your children) from getting away. If you are planning to flee a domestic violence situation, plan quietly. In Shelby County, there are a number of places you can go when fleeing. The Crime Victims and Rape Crisis Center (CVRCC) has list of resources, including shelters, that you can go to. The link is below for your convenience. The most important advice when planning to flee—go somewhere that the person you are fleeing from would never expect. While it may feel comfortable to head to a close relative’s or friend’s home, this is the first place your aggressor will look.

If you are planning to flee, having a packed “go bag” ready and hidden is also vital. Pack changes of clothes, your most important necessities, cash, extra medication, and any other important item you will need. If you have children, have a packed and hidden go bag ready for the children as well. Keep in mind that bank cards and credit cards can be tracked, so we always advise keeping a stash of cash that can’t be traced. If you can’t get cash yourself because your accounts are closely monitored, ask a friend or relative for a loan. Remember that in domestic abuse situations, your support system will be vital for your mental health. Keep them close.

With the new age of technology, phones are easily traceable. If you are planning to leave and absolutely need your cell phone, change your apple ID and password. It is wise to create a brand-new email that your aggressor has no knowledge of. If you can, we recommend turning off your device and grabbing a cheap “burner phone” with a new telephone number. These can be bought at Walmart, Target, etc.

Leave at a time where you and your children can safely get out. Coordinate with your support system if needed. Above all else, be safe. If you have to involve the police, do so.

Once you’re out of the house and in a safe location, how do you ensure you and your children are protected? In Tennessee, you can file an Order of Protection on behalf of yourself and your children. An Order of Protection is a legal avenue with which you receive an Order from the Court prohibiting your aggressor from coming about you (and your children) or contacting you (or your children)—directly or indirectly, and may also allow you to take temporary possession of your home, give you temporary custody of the children, and receive other remedies. What makes an Order of Protection crucial is that the aggressor is not allowed to possess firearms while the Order of Protection is in place. Doing so may result in their arrest.

Orders of Protection, once in affect, are in place for up to one (1) year. If someone has abused you and you wish to receive an order of protection, you must have one of the following relationships:

  1. Spouse or ex-spouse;
  2. Someone you live or lived with;
  3. Anyone you are dating;
  4. Anyone you are having or had a sexual relationship with;
  5. A same sex partner you lived with, dated, or had a sexual relationship with;
  6. Anyone you are related to by blood or adoption; or
  7. Anyone you are or were related to by marriage.

If you fall into one of these categories and have experienced domestic abuse, stalking, or sexual assault, we recommend you pursue an Order of Protection as quickly as possible.

October in Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Shelby County has resources available to assist you in obtaining an Order of Protection. Shelby County’s Crime Victim and Rape Crisis Center located at 1060 Madison Avenue, Memphis, Tennessee 38104, assists with Order of Protection filing. You can find information on their website about reaching out. You can make an appointment or stop by at your convenience during their business hours. All services at the CVRCC are free and confidential. Along with assisting with Orders of Protection, they also provide services such as trauma healing, support groups, and community collaboration to support and encourage you through this difficult period of your life.

Outside of Shelby County? Many counties provide similar family safety or crime victim centers to assist you in fleeing a domestic violence situation. Smaller counties may assist through the local police or sheriff’s office.

An Order of Protection may be granted on an ex parte, temporary, basis. You will then have a hearing in front of a Judge to determine whether your Order of Protection will stay in place for up to one (1) year. Your aggressor is entitled to a hearing, so be prepared for this. It is highly recommended you hire a lawyer to assist in the filing and/or hearing of Orders of Protection to keep you and your children safe.

Experienced family law attorneys are ready and willing to assist, and can help you in your next steps, whether that’s obtaining a divorce or requesting custody of your precious children.

As you navigate this process, remember that you are not alone. Keep yourself and your family safe. Should you have any questions about the Order of Protection process and fleeing a domestic violence situation, give us a call at Miles Mason Family Law Group.

Danielle Husseini, Esq.

Additional Resources and links:

On our web site, for legal updates and commentary, see our Domestic Violence category on our MemphisDivorce.com Tennessee Family Law Blog, and these posts, references, resources and more:

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